Bing Crosby Image Search

Here's a 28mm Bing Crosby from Pulp Figures. He and Bob can now have 28mm-scale adventures on roads of the imagination. 
 

Bob Hope: Mini Golfer, or Golfer Mini?

Here he is, one of comedy's greats, Mister Bob Hope, as seen in the Road movies, just puttering around with Bing. 
 

Bowery Boys

Dese five yoots may be technically delinquents, see? But that's because they ain't got nothin', least of all respect, and they have to fight for every scrap. They got a code, they ain't bullies, and they ain't rats. They just wanna get out of the Bowery, and who can blame 'em? These kids got gumption. If adults would just give 'em have the chance, why, they'd show the world they mean somethin'. Tell the chief you heard that from me, Benny Cough Drops. <cough><cough>
 

Tropical Castaway

 

Miss Marple

 

Hurcule Poirot

 

A Pair of Gangland Gals

Forthright, fearsome, and fashionable. Unfortunately, these are among a batch of figures with a weird layer of dusting left behind by the matte varnish spray. The problem came and went within one can; weird. 
 

Frank "The Mailman" Cory

The mail is in the guitar case. 
 

Great Warrior

Bob Murch at Pulp Figures sometimes throws in little freebies when I order his minis. I've grateful for the gesture, especially when it presents challenges like this one, with so many tiny details. I'm pretty pleased with how this guy turned out, from the skin tones to the facial details to the costume. 

 

She Who Bore the Blade

I'm quite happy with this figure's hair and face. The blade isn't bad either, considering its tiny scale. 
 

Dapper Gangland Gal

Can't go wrong with a tuxedo and tails, or so they tell me. 
 

Cylons Three

 

Oscar Guesses 2025 Results

 

Oscar Guesses 2025

I'm not sure why I still care. I guess because I love film, even though the Academy Awards have been so terribly flawed for their entire history. 

Brave Mountaineer

Like brave mountaineers
We never were much bothered by the climb
 

Queen of the Jungle

Described only as "Krogar's Wife" over at Pulp Figures, I dub thee. . . "Jean Porter." 
 

Young Shorty Smith

"Gee whillikers!" yelped young Shorty Smith as the 12,000-pound blockbuster dropped gracefully from the Lancaster's open belly. "I sure wish I was up in that airplane instead of down here on the roof of the German munitions factory! What a pickle we're in now, Spy Smasher!" 

"Yes, I suppose we should have checked with the RAF before smashing the spy ring we found here," mused Spy Smasher philosophically. "But at least that ring will be double smashed, along with tens of thousands of rounds of Ratzi ammo." 

"Golly, Spy Smasher, if a plucky kid from Oklahoma has to die, well, dying for democracy has got to be the best way!" 

"Chin up, Shorty--we're not dead yet. I just happened to bring my jet pack, and you're light enough to carry along." 

"A jet pack! Wow! Wait--what's a jet pack?" 

"It's like a little V2 you strap onto your back--like this--and we're the payload! Up, up, and away!" 

"KABOOM!" yelled the blockbuster just as the plucky Allied troopers soared off into the clouds. 

"ARGH!" cried the munitions plant as it was blown into smithereens. 
 

Dopey the Robot

 

Revolver

Another circuit around the sun. 
 

Perched Owl

 

I'm Down with Turtles All the Way Down

 

Ocelot

 

Jinx Johnson's Harlem Jazz Quartet

 

Blood Shed

In a parallel universe, a different version of me is enjoying a successful, if notorious, career as a filmmaker. The latest hit from his Paranoid Productions studio is Blood Shed, currently garnering attention not because of its story, but its unconventional style. In Blood Shed, Paranoid-me grafts modern explicit violence effects to an otherwise mid-20th century aesthetic, creating an uncanny effect disturbing audiences all over Earth-E (for Excessive Violence). 

Blood Shed is a Technicolor western set in a lonely corner of 1870s New Mexico Territory. Horst Horseman is carving farmland from desert scrub, and against all odds, he is on the verge of success. The harvest to come is poised to be his most successful yet, and he is eager to share the bounty with other settlers and their Navajo neighbours. 

But just as his crops ripen, Horst is set upon by a roving band of banjo-strumming bandits who call themselves the Banjo Bandit Band. Horst offers the bandits fresh fruits, vegetables, and water from his hard-won well, but the bandits aren't here for charity--they're here for plunder. After first taunting Horst with a truly dreadful banjo performance, they beat him senseless and toss him into the woodshed, staining it all over with blood--hence the film's title. 

Anytime from the dawn of cinema through the 1950s would generally treat this violence tastefully, either cutting away from the action to let the audience imagine it for themselves or bloodlessly pantomiming the action. In Blood Shed, however, we see every punch, kick, and banjo-clobbering in rapturous slow motion, with every spray of ichor, goose egg, blackened eye, and broken bone captured with intense realism. 

The Banjo Bandit Band leaves Horst for dead in a slowly spreading pool of his own blood as they steal his crops and burn his humble homestead to the ground. Miraculously, the fire does not spread to the titular Blood Shed, and Horst's broken body is discovered by his horrified neighbors. 

Moved by Horst's plight, several of Horst's fellow settlers team up with sympathetic Navajo warriors to chase down the Banjo Bandit Band. As it turns out, they're easy to track, because they won't stop playing their banjos. The rest of the film details the running battle between the bandits and Horst's posse--really just an excuse to create graphically realistic arrow, bullet, and knife wounds in the context of a B-list midcentury western steeped in the production values of the time: some location shooting, canned music, generous use of rear projection, stilted dialogue, continuity errors, and acting ranging from merely terrible to workmanlike. In the end, Horst is avenged and his friends help him rebuild the farm. 

Alternate-Woods would later use the same technique to create similarly dissonant films noir (Teeth On a Midnight Sidewalk, Blood-Soaked Tide*), musicals (The Iced Capades, Xanadoom), comedy (The Three Stooges Go to the Hospital, The Three Stooges in Blunt Trauma), horror (There Is No Anesthesiologist in This Hospital, Castle of Stone Stairs, Brutal Fists of Frankenstein), science fiction (Magnificent Devastation, Attack of the Needlessly Sadistic Saucer Men), absurdism (Who Filled the Washing Machine with Dynamite?), and even the Oscar-winning drama Senseless Violence. 

Poor alternate Sylvia. 

*With product placement of the famous detergent

Feathers and Fangs

This was a decent exercise in attempting to blend colours together more naturally. I'd love to visit the lost world this creature inhabited.