25 Years of Wedded Bliss for Jeff and Susan

Earlier this evening, two of my oldest friends, Jeff and Susan, celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary (following an eight-year engagement)! Sylvia and I were delighted to attend the celebration, reconnecting with some old friends over a scrumptious catered Ukrainian dinner. 

We were delighted to see that our old friends Michael and Naomi showed up for the party, too. 

Squeaky chicken party favours for the win!

Two happy couples!

Three happy couples! (Context: I met Susan, Jeff, and Michael back in 1987 via the University of Alberta Star Trek Club.) 

We also got to meet Susan's lovely Aunt Mary, who we picked up on the way to the event. Plenty of Jeff and Susan's loved ones were there, and we reconnected with Korch, who Sylvia and I met independently before we'd actually met each other. It's a small world after all . . .  

Thanks, Jeff and Susan, for inviting us to this lovely affair, and Sylvia and I both hope that you'll enjoy many, many more loving and happy years together. 

Sad Ambulance

In my own defence, I'm not finished painting this yet. But oof, what was I thinking? I mean, the base colour is okay, and the Red Cross symbols turned out all right considering I did them freehand, but that red trim is just awful. 

My aim here was to paint this in the style of a real-life ambulance that I encountered in 1995. A friend of Jeff and Susan's came over to help them move, and he arrived in a vehicle something like this. 
 

More Colours Out of Time

 Here's a black and white photo of Mom (right) with her older sister, my Aunt Jean. It was taken sometime in the 1950s at the farm near Virden, Manitoba. 

Here's the same photo colourized by Jason Antic's image colourization software. Colourizing black and white imagery is nothing new, of course, but I'm pretty impressed by the results given how easy it is to use the software; just upload your photo and the algorithm spits out its best guess. 

I deliberately chose to shoot some of Michael and Naomi's wedding with black and white film. Here are Jeff and Susan at that wedding in glorious black and white.

And here they are in colour. 

Say what you will about the wisdom of colourization, but for all its flaws I find the process fascinating, and I imagine the colours will achieve greater fidelity and believability as the technology improves. 

Superman vs. Apollo

Many years ago, Jeff and Susan and Ron and Tony came over to make some silly stop-action movies with me. Here's a screenshot from one of them, "Superman Gets Drunk:" Superman assaults an innocent Command/Service Module (CSM) from the Apollo program. I really need to digitize the video and post it on YouTube. 

Jeff and Susan Visit!

Two Toilets and a Little Lady

Some months back, I ordered two 3D-printed shapeshifters disguised as toilets and a 28mm nurse miniature. I modified one shapeshiting (typo, but I'm not fixing it!) toilet, carving off its teeth and tongue to create a normal (if plugged) commode. I painted the other toilet with grotesque poo-boscis extended and diarrhea stains overflowing the bowl. In between this noxious duo stands Nurse Cherry Bubbles, Paladin of O.R.D.E.R., a character based on Susan Shyluk.

One might ask why I went to such lengths. It's because Jeff Shyluk has been working on a Toilet Chase board game for a while, so I thought these trinkets could serve as rough prototypes for game pieces. I mailed him the pieces a few weeks ago, and he sent me this photo at my request, since I forgot to capture them myself. 

Reflections on an Ancient Ambulance

Photograph, 1993. 

Sylvia and the Lilies

From our trip to visit Jeff, Susan and Steven in 2010. 

Bug on a Leaf

I shot this  while  visiting Jeff and Susan in Port Coquitlam in 2010. Not bad! 

The Wrong Turn

Many years ago--sometime during the early-to-mid 1990s--I was out with my friends Jeff, Susan, Tony, Steven and Ron. Carrie and Allan may have been there too. We were out searching for films to play for our semi-regular bad movie night. Back in those halcyon days, we would visit video rental stores and pore over racks and racks of VHS cassettes. Sometimes the trip itself was as fun or more than the movies themselves.

In this particular instance, we spotted a video store in the Oliver district of Edmonton, in the strip mall that hosts a Brit's Fish & Chips now. We sauntered in and started browsing, and within a few minutes we all realized that the entire store consisted only of the porn section...it was, in fact, an adult video store, a fact that all of us somehow missed. We skittered out, tittering nervously, faces flushed with embarrassed laughter. We were all close, but not so close that we had any interest in perusing pornography together; we were not nearly so hip.

I don't recall if we regrouped to find another video store or if we wound up playing board games or something. It's funny how some memories stick, while others flutter off into invisibility. 

Jeff's Personal Fame Meter

As is my wont, I sometimes write "as is my wont." But also as is my wont, I also sometimes, and not just because I'm feeling sick or lazy, use this blog to advertise the work of other bloggers. In this case, I'd like to direct Earliad reader's to a JSVB post from a couple of days ago, in which you can view the current status of Jeff's Personal Fame Meter. Not only is the Fame Meter well executed, I quite enjoy the dry wit evidenced in the work. Oh, and there's some football stuff there for sports fans, and an "I'm Nearly Famous" callback to my days when an actor gave me a button with those words way back in 1985 when I appeared in a pilot on CBC. Still nearly famous, never quite getting there...thankfully. 

Regaling Frequencies Open

Last night I was surprised by a FaceTime call from my old friend Steven Neumann, who dialed me in to briefly join a celebration of our mutual friend Jeff's 50th birthday. I was quite touched to be included in the celebrations at a distance, and watched as Susan lit Jeff's big 50-shaped sparklers. It was quite a festive conflagration!

Inspired by the call, early this morning I celebrated Jeff's birthday in my own way, with a silly email based on some shared in-jokes that go back over a quarter century...which means that Jeff and I have known each other for longer than we hadn't known each other--rather a sobering thought.

Here's the story, which will make little sense to anyone except for Jeff, his wife Susan, her brother Steven, and my wife, Sylvia, who you may spot in this story as thinly-disguised analogues of themselves. And after you read the story, be sure to visit Jeff's blog and buy some art!

*  *  *

Captain Wolverine's knuckles, white with fury, clung to the jewel-encrusted arms of his command throne. No other hint of turmoil crossed his Saturnine features. Coolly, he swiveled the throne to face his elegant yet disdainful - one would almost say insubordinate - communications officer, red-skirted, blonde-beehived, Lieutenant Feral.

"Repeat that last, Lieutenant!" barked Wolverine. It came out as a dare. Feral rolled her eyes.

"There's an incoming transmission from the U.S.S. Encounter," she said. "Admiral Woods has a message for you."

Resigning himself, Captain Wolverine turned his throne to face the bridge's main viewer.

"Put him on," he sighed.

The screen flickered from a starfield to the rakish, dashing visage of Admiral Woods himself, who was currently leaning forward in his own command chair, one eyebrow raised, his slash of a mouth forming an insouciant grin.

"Captain Wolverine," he said. "I hear congratulations are in order."

"Yes," Wolverine replied casually, leaning back in his chair, crossing his legs insolently. "You speak of course of our successful first contact with the Sequential Analog Loving Intellect Validator mark 8 machine culture. Really, the credit goes to my Chief Medical Officer, Commander Steadfast, and her brother, our Science Officer, Commander Ice. They're the ones who..."

"I wasn't actually talking about the SALIV-8 matter, though of course it was quite an accomplishment. No, I brought you something. Transporter room, beam over the package."

In the space just above Captain Wolverine's lap, a swirl of matter suddenly coalesced into a small paperback book, which plopped gently onto his crossed legs.

"What's this?" Wolverine wondered, opening the book to a random page. "'There no doubt existed computer dossiers in half a dozen capitals on the sexual tastes and proclivities of Jonathan Emeric Anderson. Whoever had selected Charla Boyd knew exactly what they were doing; she looked as if she had been literally materialized out of Jack's own sexual fantasies...'"

Wolverine put the book down and looked askance at the Admiral. "Message, Woods?"

The Admiral shrugged innocently. "None that I am aware of, except of course...happy birthday."

Wolverine grimaced. "How did you find out?"

"Well, I could be mysterious and say something like 'It's my business to know," but to be honest your wife and brother-in-law ratted you out."

Wolverine threw an annoyed glare at Steadfast and Ice. Steadfast responded by leaning in behind the command throne and gnawing on Wolverine's throat, while Ice chuckled dryly (his nickname was, in fact, "Dry Ice.").

"You run a tight ship, Captain Wolverine," Woods mocked gently and somewhat hypocritically, being no paragon of discipline himself. "Report to Starbase 50 immediately for R&R, and by the way, I'm poaching Lieutenant Feral from you; her transfer to my command will take effect as soon as you dock."

Feral rolled her eyes again. "It's not real, Earl."

Woods shook his fists over his head theatrically. "I'm doing a bit, Monkey! Also, down with metanarrative."

"I hate when you do this," Wolverine said.

"I wonder," Woods replied. "Anyway, happy birthday, and may you enjoy many more to come."

"Channel closed," Feral reported. "Can we wrap up this story so I can put on some real clothes and get out of these dumb pajamas?"

"Set course for Starbase 50," Wolverine said, making finger-guns at the viewscreen. Alexander Courage's trumpet fanfare rolled across the bow as the ship banked to port, credits superimposed over the VFX before the image faded to black. 

Starring Earl as Earl in Toilet Chase

As the video above explains, I'm playing the part of myself as I appeared in Toilet Chase, an unproduced screenplay from the early 1990s. I'm unsure, as of yet, how to critique my own performance, except to say that I need to keep Brendan Hunter's advice in mind: this is a more intimate performance format than some others, so I need to be cautious about overplaying some moments, as I feel I have here. I also noted some engineering issues - I clearly have to figure out how to properly set the microphone, my own position, and my own volume levels.

Even with the hiccups, this was a fun exercise. Wouldn't it be cool if Jeff, Ron, Susan and Allan recorded their parts? Then I could create a real radio play, and the dream of producing some version of Toilet Chase would be reality. Heck, Jeff could animate it! 

All Choked Up

Sometime back in 1995, my friend Steven Neumann mock-choked me. I like how the gentle, easygoing smile on his face - typical of Steven - constrasts with my maniacal gurgling. I imagine his sister Susan probably shot this strange image. 

Stooge Defence Pattern Alpha

Here is a photo of Jeff and Susan from the mid-1990s. In this dramatic image, Jeff uses the only known maneuver that foils the dreaded Stooge form eyeball assault. I'm still amazed that I had the reflexes to get this shot. 

Earl Noir

If it were shot on black and white film instead of colour videotape, I'd almost claim that this screen capture from Generous Nature could serve as a legitimate example of film noir, thanks to its claustrophobic composition. I totally meant to do that! 

Jeff and Susan and the Superman Comic Book

In the mid-90s Milestone Comics and DC Comics published an intercompany crossover story about the Milestone characters and DC's Superman family. One issue came packaged with a set of vinyl stickers you could apply to the front and back of the comic; it was a do-it-yourself cover. For whatever reason, Jeff and Susan posed with it on a visit to my basement lodgings in 1995. 

Things I Have Seen Hit Jeff in the Teeth

1) A Frisbee, flung by Susan; shortly after, Ron's arm got friction-burned in a melee involving a Ring-O

2) A heavy white plastic alligator clip, accidentally sprung off a desk and into Jeff's mouth by Earl in 620 SUB

3) A nickel, after bouncing off of desk in 620 SUB - Earl also responsible

My Facebook Graffiti Archive: The Rebuttals

Here are drawings other, more talented, people posted on my Facebook wall with the Graffiti application. I can identify art by Sean, Andrea and/or Greg, and Jeff, posted by his wife Susan. My sentimental favourite is the wedding postcard, and I adore both "Who...SHAVING CREAM?!?" and the jaws laughing at my grave, but clearly Jeff's "Earl in S.T. uniform attacked by cute hamsters with blood-soaked weapons" is the most accomplished in terms of technique and irony.

Here's an idea: assuming Graffiti still works, maybe I should use it to post something on the wall of each and every one of my Facebook friends, even those I haven't met in person. Hmmm...

Cheesecak Remembrance

How oft the memories drift
Like whipped cream launched betwixt bearded lips
Or coffee spill'd into hapless laps;

We were once a cheesecak league
Wand'ring in search of a cayfee
Until time tore us asunder.

Until tonight we knights of the dessert fork
Gathered round to once again square the circle
And chortl'd of cheesecaks past;

And having supped, broke bread and hearts
And drove off into the night
Until time's arrow should fork once more
Somewhere beneath the giant staple