Vernal Geekquinox 2023: The Spice Must Flow!

 

We had a hot time in the old town last night as Pete and Ellen hosted another utterly delightful Geekquinox, this time themed around hot spices. The spice did indeed flow, and many sinuses and intestinal tracts were cleared! 

I talked to Mom about the menu on Friday night, and we both agreed that neither of us would be likely to try anything hotter than the Heartbeat Pineapple Habanero, but I surprised myself last night by sampling each. Surprisingly, I found the hottest spice more palatable than the second-hottest, which had my pores and sinuses open wide and my tongue twisting in protest. Regarding flavour, my favourites were the Heartbeat Pineapple, the Los Calientes, and the Ginger Goat Original. I can't really call them hot after detonating The Bomb in my mouth; each offered a nice mixture of sweet or sour to temper the heat. 

Scott samples a sauce. 

I don't believe I've ever had homemade guacamole before last night. It was scrumptious, and a welcome antidote to the heat. 

Pete often prepares his amazing chicken chili verde at Gaming & Guinness, and I'll never tire of it. I could live on this stuff. 

Pete spends most of his time at Geekquinox cooking, but luckily he could take breaks to enjoy his own preparations, thanks to occasional sous-chefing from Ellen and some of the more talented guests. (I was fit only for crumbling some feta into a measuring cup.) 

For example, here's Jeff stirring that delicious chili. 

And here's Steve coring the fruit out of a pineapple. Mmmm. 

Ohhhh yeah. 

Steve enjoys some chili. 

The incredible hamachi shot. 

One of Pete's kitchen light bulbs had been burned out for years, and I'm proud to say that I was among the first to notice he'd finally changed the bulb. Huzzah! 

Our hostess enjoys a steaming cup of specially-brewed spirited rum coffee with butterscotch whipped cream. Even a teetotaler like me has to admit that sounds pretty good. 

Mike's animated conversation brings life to every gathering graced with his peripatetic presence. 

We all feasted on chips, guacamole, and hot sauce between courses. 

But in truth, coming together to share our stories and laugh is the best thing about Geekquinox. Or is it the food? No, it's the friendship. No, the food...they're both amazing. 

The pork and pineapple skewers were heavenly, rivalling, in my eyes (or rather, in my mouth), the chili verde.

Sylvia and I had to leave before the day wrapped up, and boy do I regret missing the Mexican street corn. But needs must! 

Don't skimp on the cheese sauce. 

Sylvia and I feel incredibly lucky to have such lovely friends and to be part of what's become one of our favourite traditions. Thanks again, Pete and Ellen! 

For more, check out Steve's thoughts on the night. 

How to Be a Geek

Sean's friend Laura suggested I offer some thoughts on how to be a geek; she further suggested these thoughts should come in the form of a top ten list.

Of course, I cannot possibly speak for all geeks. If you think of yourself as a geek, you're a geek.

But for those people who don't consider themselves geeks but are curious about the subculture, I suppose some pointers on understanding the geek mind (or at least my geek mind) might be in order.

1) Read a lot. If you read a lot, you're likely to be exposed to something you can geek out about, whether that be a favourite writer, genre, style or subject. My own path to geekdom began with the printed page, starting with Superman comics and the works of Edgar Rice Burroughs.

2) Pursue your interests with passion. If you're a geek and you like something, odds are you'll not only enjoy that thing, your hobbies may revolve around that thing. You might even start producing your own versions of that thing.

3) Find like-minded people to discuss your interests. Over the years, I've belonged to a number of organizations, both online and in the real world, geared toward bringing geeks of one flavour or another together. This usually leads to amusing debates such as "Who's better, Kirk or Picard?"

4) Don't be self-conscious about what you love. While it wasn't easy growing up as a bookworm, film lover and Trekkie who didn't care for sports, there's no sense in hiding your passions, even if you wind up getting teased. If I'd kept my obsessions to myself, I would have missed out on meeting countless friends.

5) On the other hand, don't forget to explore. While that thing you love may indeed be the coolest thing ever, the world is full of all kinds of other cool stuff. Broaden your horizons constantly. I read a romance novel a couple of years ago for the first time ever, and I found its construction and tropes utterly amazing. It hasn't made me a lover of romance novels, but the experience gave me a better understanding of that genre's readership and of its impact on the things I like.

6) Learn how to handle your computer. Your PC (or Mac) is your gateway to all kinds of geeky experiences, beyond merely surfing the internet. Gaming, writing, photo manipulation, video editing, podcasting, virtual reality, music composition and all kinds of other pursuits are facilitated and enhanced by computers, and knowing how to do more than simply turn it on will make those pursuits much more rewarding.

7) Respect and celebrate the indifference of others. Not everyone is going to get into My Little Pony or Game of Thrones or model rocketry like you do. And that's cool. They almost certainly have some very cool interests of their own.

8) Pay attention to politics. I know, what a drag! But being involved is important because in a democracy, the people we elect pass laws that can either facilitate or hamper our enjoyment of the pursuits we love. It wasn't so long ago that people were trying to ban Dungeons & Dragons; some jurisdictions continue to ban all kinds of books. The Internet is constantly under attack by corporate and government interests who want to make it slower, more expensive, more invasive of your privacy, and more censored.

9) Reassess, revisit and revise your pursuits every ten years or so. Take a break from one of your obsessions and then take a look through older eyes once some time has passed. I've done this a number of times and always appreciate what a new perspective adds to things I loved at a younger age.

10) Read, watch, play, experience, or at least read the Wikipedia article about the following: Star Trek, Star Wars, Robert Heinlein, Isaac Asimov, Arthur C. Clarke, J.R.R. Tolkien, George R.R. Martin, Planet of the Apes, Big Trouble in Little China, Flash Gordon, DC Comics, Marvel Comics, Lego, Kenner, Atari, Pac-Man, Intellivision, Nintendo, Space Invaders, Futurama, The Simpsons, Battlestar Galactica, Civilization, Tron, bacon, Fallout, Grand Theft Auto, Dungeons & Dragons, usenet, Electronic Bulletin Board Systems, Harry Potter, Alfred Hitchcock, Godzilla, The Terminator, RoboCop, Stephen King, The Twilight Zone, The Outer Limits, Lois McMaster Bujold, Connie Willis, board games, memes, Photoshop, Live Action Role Playing, MUDs, Mary Shelley, Ursula K. LeGuin, David Cronenberg, David Lynch...

Well. That last bullet could go on forever, couldn't it? In the end, though, it's not really important what geeky passion you pursue; all that matters is you love it. 

The Weight of Another World

--SYSTEM INTERRUPT--BREACH DETECTED--

--ANOMALOUS LIFEFORM--BASELINE HUMAN--ORIGIN--QUARANTINE ZONE--DESIGNATION--EARTH-33/EARTH SUPERPRIME

--MAXIMUM SANCTION AUTHORIZED--

--OVERRIDE MAXIMUM SANCTION--

--APPREHEND AND ISOLATE--

--ACTIVATE OPERATION LAST RESORT--

--EXECUTE--

At an undisclosed location somewhere on Earth-5. 

--Panels One Through Two Hundred Eighteen--Page One Splash--Begin: 

"Mr. Woods Goes to Metropolis!"

The visitor awoke in a daze, blinking at the searing light pointed right into his face, grunting with early-morning incoherence. He reached out for Sylvia, but she wasn't there - in fact, he wasn't even in bed, though he was still wearing the t-shirt and underwear he'd worn to sleep.

"GAH!" he screamed, scrambling backward into the corner of the black leather couch he found himself on, staring wide-eyed at the fierce-looking black woman who was regarding him with something between annoyance and contempt. Her voice was granite.

"Listen closely. You won't be harmed and your wife is fine. My name is Amanda Waller and I need your help. This world needs your help."

The visitor froze. "Oh, this is going to be cool," he said, grinning from ear to ear. His lucid dreams often involved superheroic adventures, though nev--

She slapped him.

"Ow!"

"This isn't a dream, Mr. Woods. You were right; everything happens somewhere, including the stories you read in your world - the ones printed in comic books. From your perspective, you'd think of this place as Earth-5."

The visitor was still pretty sure he was dreaming, but pain in his dreams felt real enough, so he nodded. Might as well play along.

"We've been waiting for someone like you for a long time," Waller said. "We've had accidental visitors from Earth-33 before, but none of them fit the profile we needed. According to the portions of your blog we've been able to scan, you might just be geeky enough to help us."

"The Justice League has been disbanded. The United Nations revoked their charter."

"Gosh, that's terrible," the visitor said. He found it strange that he'd used the word "gosh" in actual conversation.

"It's worse than terrible. It's catastrophic. We don't have enough time to go over all the details, but as a consequence of recent events none of this world's heroes trust each other, nor do the various government agencies and NGOS with JLA oversight trust the heroes. And the Phantom Stranger popped into my bedroom last night to warn me that 'armageddeon is nigh.' Those were his exact words."

"Holey Moley!"

Waller raised an eyebrow.

"Sorry. I'm not sure why I'm talking like a...uh...like a comic book character."

"This world is as real to me as yours is to you," Waller said. "And it's going to need a new Justice League, an organized, united, and most importantly, versatile group of heroes to defend this Earth from the comic threat. The UN has lost its moral authority to choose the team members, and there isn't one hero that's universally trusted to do the job. We need a neutral observer."

The visitor suddenly understood.

"I get it. I'm familiar with all the DC characters and how they interact with each other, their powers, their secret identities...so who better to choose their membership?"

Waller relaxed a little, relieved the visitor understood.

"The Stranger said something else. 'No more than one score.' He wouldn't explain, but these magic types don't lay down rules without good reason. So your JLA is restricted to 20 members or less."

Waller dumped a thick binder in the visitor's lap.

"They're all there in alphabetical order in case you don't remember everyone you have to choose from. I'll leave you to it. When you've prepared your list, press the big orange "Publish" button on the wall and you'll be sent back to your Earth."

The visitor figured he really was dreaming or trapped in a piece of particularly annoying metafiction, but there seemed to be little else to do but compose the list. Well, it was a simple enough task: just imagine the heroes he'd want on the team if it were his world they were defending from an undefined but catastrophic threat.

He contemplated for a while, then scratched down names on the pad of paper Waller had left him:

Superman
Wonder Woman
Batman
Green Lantern
The Flash
Dr. Fate
Zatanna
Firestorm
Green Arrow
Black Canary
Red Tornado
Animal Man
Martian Manhunter
Aquaman
Hawkman
Elongated Man
The Atom
Captain Marvel
Captain Atom
Power Girl

He added a note:

"Without knowing the exact nature of the threat Earth-5 faces, I've been conservative with my choices while trying to includes heroes who are comfortable in a variety of physical environments and who offer different power sets and intellectual and emotional gifts. If I were Maxwell Lord or the Secretary General of the United Nations and I had a guarantee that every person I picked would agree to serve...this would be my list. Good luck."

He pressed Published, and was gone.

My Ideal Justice League Lineup

Comic book nerds like me often have their favourite team line-ups, often based on the team's composition during the golden age, i.e., the golden age of the comic-loving kid, between ages 6 to 12 or so. For me, my team was the Justice League of America and my line-up was the 1970s league, or as it's often called the "Satellite League" because they operated out of the Justice League satellite orbiting Earth. At this time the League included most of the icons: Superman, Batman, Wonder Woman, the Flash, Green Lantern, Aquaman, and secondary favourites including the Atom, Black Canary, the Elongated Man, Red Tornado, Hawkman and Hawkgirl, Green Arrow, and, later, Firestorm and Zatanna. 

I grew out of comics in my very early teens but then returned to them in my late teens, thanks mostly to Stephen Fitzpatrick and his steadfast refusal to shun certain pursuits just because some people regard them as childish. I started reading comics again in late high school and continued reading them throughout university up until...well, now, basically. So I've seen quite a few different Justice Leagues, my second-favourite almost certainly being the hilarious yet dramatic Giffen/DeMatteis League of the late 1980s/early 1990s. It's weird to think of this team as updated and modern considering their adventures are now decades in the past, but this was the first JLA since the Crisis on Infinite Earths that had upset the DC universe's status quo. This new League had a couple of old mainstays like Batman and Black Canary, but also brought aboard New Gods like Mr. Miracle and Big Barda, new-ish character Booster Gold, Earth-4 transplants the Blue Beetle and Captain Atom, Earth-2 transplant Dr. Fate, a new and churlish Green Lantern, Captain Marvel, former Global Guardians Fire and Ice, and an evolving assortment of new and rebooted characters. 

As enjoyable as those stories and teams were, though, I always felt that they could be improved upon with the addition of certain characters and the subtraction of others. Like any fan, I imagined how awesome it would be to have a Justice League composed only of my favourite characters without the distractions of the ones I found annoying. (Mature readers understand the importance of not being pandered to, but this thought experiment is about wish fulfilment.) Think of it as fantasy football or fantasy baseball, but for geeks. 

So, without further ado, the JLE, or Justice League of Earl: 

Superman

Of course Superman is going to be on my team. He's the prototypical superhero, the embodiment of truth and justice. His boy scout attitude is both inspirational and provides more pragmatic team members with a source of frustration and amusement. Plus his powers are fun to explore - always versatile and interesting, if written properly. 

Wonder Woman

The prototypical superheroine is a great match for Superman, with a fascinating mythological backstory and a compelling dichotomy between loving compassion and ruthless warrior instincts. 

Green Lantern

As in the superb Justice League animated series, I'd go with John Stewart rather than Hal Jordan or one of the other Earth Lanterns. But I'd make sure to return him to his roots as an architect with a love of Streisand, rather than the stereotypical US Marine he's characterized as these days. 

The Atom

Every team needs a brilliant scientist, and Ray Palmer not only fills that role, he's a great catalyst for adventures at the subatomic level, for that, of course, is the Atom's super-power. He's also Jewish, which adds a touch of diversity. 

Green Arrow

Angry 1970s diehard liberal Green Arrow was the social conscience of the League, and he could be again. 

Black Canary

She has guts, brains, she's tough, sexy, determined, incredibly skilled and passionate, and her bickering with the Green Arrow is often a lot of fun. 

The Elongated Man

I like Ralph because he's often underestimated. His stretching power is a little goofy, but people forget that he's a fine detective. He also has a public, rather than a secret, identity, and he's married, which has, in the past, led to some fun domestic drama. 

Zatanna

Every team needs a mystic, and Zatanna has an interesting backstory, a funky gimmick (the backwards spells), and a tragic past. She's the gateway to stories of myth and magic. 

Firestorm

As a composite of two people - a young jock and a middle-aged scientist - Firestorm combines atomic angst with the pressures of growing up and a very interesting surrogate father/son dynamic. Plus his powerset is very cool and unusual. 

Red Tornado

Red Tornado's 1970s look is one of the great character designs of the era, and like Firestorm, he has a versatile and interesting powerset. He's also an android built by a League enemy, which offers fertile storytelling possibilities. 

Black Lightning

Schoolteacher Jefferson Pierce is one of my favourite characters, an angry black man straight out of the blaxploitation era. Another hero with a great costume design and cool powers, Black Lightning comes with a tragic past to rival Batman's. 

Blue Beetle

Ted Kord was a great source of humour in the 80s League; he's also a rich guy with a lot of high-tech toys. He's sort of like Batman, but less troubled. 

Doctor Light

The first Doctor Light was a villain, but Kimiyo Hoshi took the name (and a similar costume) during the Crisis, and joined the 80s League a few years later. She's a single mother and a medical doctor, as well as a healthy dose of offputting arrogance. 

Captain Atom

Great powers, fantastic "costume" (really a shell of alien metal), excellent supporting characters and a military mindset, which works nicely in opposition to liberal characters like Green Arrow and Superman. 

Tomorrow Woman

Another android created by the same villain who built Red Tornado, Tomorrow Woman appeared in only one issue of JLA in the 90s - but it was such a great story that I'd find a way to bring her back. Fun, upbeat, heroic and self-sacrificing, she'd make a great counterpoint to the more dour Red Tornado. 

Bronze Tiger

A fearsome martial artist and reformed member of the evil League of Assassins. 

The Question

Faceless conspiracy theorist and a great foil for some of the more naive characters. Fantastic character design and great for the urban milieu. 

Jonah Hex

Yes, he's from the Wild West, but he's no stranger to time travel, and he'd be hilariously out of place in the Justice League. 

So that's my list. I think I could get a pretty solid two or three year run out of these guys. 

Next Year I'm Going

I thought about heading to the Edmonton Expo this weekend, but in the end inertia took hold and I stayed at home to read and play Civilization instead.. Sometimes you should leave the house, though, for by staying home I missed what sounds like a very cool presentation on Edmonton's future by Mayor Don Iveson.

Fortunately Stephen Fitzpatrick was there and provided comprehensive coverage of the event on his blog, Confessions of a Middle-Aged Adolescent. If you're interested in geek culture and/or municipal politics and you missed Iveson's lively presentation, you should definitely read Steve's report. 

Love in a Lootcrate

Really, Shouldn't Everyone?

Sign spotted outside Mission Fun & Games in St. Albert

Food, the Final Frontier

Last night Sylvia and I took a trip through the Anthony Henday wormhole to Pete's place for another of his fabled Geekquinox dinners. This spring's theme was Star Trek, and once again Pete outdid himself. For sheer complexity of presentation and preparation and gastronomic delight levels, this Geekquinox was, to my mind, the best yet, despite Pete having set the bar pretty high in the past.

I knew that Pete was preparing a video of some kind to accompany dinner, for I'd helped him source some Star Trek episodes. What I didn't realize was that he was creating a video menu using the LCARS interface used in Star Trek: The Next Generation, complete with full-motion clips.

On the left, Pete listed the evening's drinks; on the right, the food courses. All items, of course, have appeared in or been inspired by at least one episode of one of the Star Trek shows - or in the case of the Transporter Accident, Galaxy Quest, the best Star Trek film that's not a Star Trek film.

Here, for example, is the menu screen for Pete's Gorn Meat Gunpowder Shot. A clip from "Arena" plays at bottom, while up top the menu displays the real-world ingredients Pete used to make the dish.

Here are the shots themselves. At first I thought this was an alcoholic beverage of some sort, so I demurred from partaking, as I'm a teetotaler. But Jeff explained that these were food shots, so I downed one - and immediately went for another. This was a remarkably spicy, savoury shot of flavour.

Sylvia, too, shared my initial skepticism. But Pete's concoction instantly won her over.

As soon as Pete told us that the next Geekquinox would be Star Trek-themed, I begged Sylvia to come with me in costume. Thinking myself quite clever. I even ordered a uniform tunic for her from Think Geek. Little did I know that all of the women in our group conspired to surprise the guys by showing up in appropriate outfits. We were completely out-geeked, though Sylvia reminded me several times that "This is never happening again!"

We shall see.

Here's another menu screen, this time explaining the composition of plomeek soup, a favourite of Vulcans such as Mr. Spock.

Scrumptious and elegantly presented!

Pete's best culinary pun was the Smorgasborg Cube, a cube of risotto accompanied by a slice of roast duck breast.

Trekkies will, of course, recognize this as part of a Borg regeneration alcove, re-purposed to give the Smorgasborg Cube's pickle and olive accompaniment a healthy green glow.

Audrey, hamming it up as usual, slurps down a pickle in hedonistic fashion as Scott looks on. Margaret, in the meantime, reaches for a carafe of Klingon bloodwine. Speaking of which...

"Brag all you want...but don't get between me and the bloodwine!"

Between courses Pete and Jeff served up Warp Core Breaches, originally served by Quark at Federation Starbase Deep Space Nine. Somehow I missed getting a screenshot of the ingredients, but Pete's LCARS display described the beverage as "Very Alcoholic."

Heather, in her "Expendable" redshirt, looked a little apprehensive about the cloud-misted beverage.

It didn't take long for things to get silly. Sillier.

What would a Star Trek party be without Romulan Ale?

Here's Pete's Transporter Accident, an inside-out serving of eggs Benedict prepared completely from scratch. "This is an appetizer?" Steve exclaimed in disbelief.

Since I don't drink, I enjoyed non-alcoholic Tranya, introduced to humanity by Balok of the First Federation. "Ah ha ha ha ha ha!"

Pete put his OCD tendencies to good use by painstakingly assembling his home-made French fries into pyramids. The Fries of Triskelion?

After each Geekquinox dinner, Pete assures his guests that "Next time it's not going to be quite so insane." I hope, for his sake, that he does indeed scale it back a little, because this time it really did get a little crazy. There's meat in those coolers, regulated by...uh...some kind of machines. Machines that look like they could have come from the engineering section of the Enterprise...

Here are the tools Pete used to craft last night's dinner. My mind is still, frankly, boggling. For example, since you can't buy radish sprouts, used in the Gorn gunpowder shot, Pete grew them hydroponically. Mr. Sulu would be proud.

By the time the "Food Cubes" (roasted potatoes with food colouring) arrived, we were too stuffed to eat another bite. To my chagrin I somehow missed getting any shots of the Heart of Targ, a softball-sized steak topped with brie, served with mushrooms and glazed with some kind of heavenly sauce beyond my poor power to describe. 

Sylvia and I left at about 2:30 am, completely sated and marvelling yet again at the sheer scale of Pete's efforts - ably assisted, we shouldn't forget, by his girlfriend Ellen. It was all we could talk about on the journey home, and again when we went to visit my parents and brother today (no mean cook himself). 

On a personal level, this has been my favourite Geekquinox yet - not simply because of the Star Trek theme, but because Sylvia was such a good sport, the food was exquisite and the company was marvellous. Of course these things are true every Geekquinox, but this time I'm especially grateful because the festivities greatly reduced some of the stress I've been feeling regarding my career path. Thanks, guys! 

Here are a few more of the evening's best images, and a short video of the Warp Core Breach version of Tranya.