Somehow, I must hack into Jeff's computer to learn what prompt and settings he used to successfully coax Stable Diffusion into concussing Gilligan with a coconut. While strangely idyllic, I must nonetheless consider these results as ignoble failures.
The trick is to put Gilligan under the coconut, and then take the picture the moment you remove the stick.
I should have added: those are all really amazing, and probably a lot more effort than what I did to make the coconut hit Gilligan directly on the head from above.
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