Monday, November 26, 2007
The Daring New Adventures of Supergirl
Supergirl sure had some astounding adventures when she first started out, didn't she?
"Supergirl, I have an important secret mission for you."
"Oh boy! I'm ready, Superman! No matter how dangerous it is!"
"I want you to visit the cenus chief in Kandor so he can register you as yet another survivor of Krypton."
Even Kryptonians had dentists, it seems. And they use..."kress beams." A little on the nose, isn't it? "Kress?" I mean, really. And what is it with comic book characters telling other characters information they should already know - assuming the person they're talking to isn't a complete imbecile? "Remember, here on Kandor, no one has super-powers, and we get toothaches like normal humans on Earth!" I'm sure Supergirl is thinking, "I know the drill, Dr. Exposition."
IF EARL LIVED IN A COMIC BOOK
CAPTION: As Earl enters the LEGISLATIVE ANNEX, home of the ALBERTA LIBERAL CAUCUS...
MLA: Hello, Earl! Have you designed that child care brochure yet? Remember, as the Communications Coordinator, your job is to ensure that our message reaches the public!
EARL (thinking): (gulp!) He's right! If I don't get the brochure done right away, citizens won't know what we stand for! Got to act fast!
CAPTION: Later, as Earl arrives home...
EARL: Hello, Sylvia! Have you cooked dinner yet? As my wife, you should be keeping me well-fed!
SYLVIA: Hello, Earl my husband! We've been married for just a few months! As your wife, isn't it about time we discussed our honeymoon!
CAPTION: Later, Earl goes out for a night with his friends, "The Boys."
EARL: Hello, chums! Are your character sheets ready! It's time for our bimonthly game of Dungeons and Dragons!
PETE: Some people say that Dungeons and Dragons is for geeks! But we always have fun, so who cares what the squares think! Besides, haven't we been playing this game since college!
MIKE: Some of you have! But some of us met through work and are relative newcomers to this strange new world of roleplaying! Give us a chance to get used to the rules!
COLIN: As Dungeon Master, I'm reminding you that what I say goes! Enough chatter! You're in a cave, and a troll attacks!
JEFF: Oh no! I rolled a one!