Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Inaction Figures

INT. SUBURBAN KITCHEN. BOBBY RUNS INTO KITCHEN AND TELLS MOM:

BOBBY: "Mom, I'm bored!"

MOM: "Why don't you and Timmy play with your action figures?"

BOB: "We're sick of action figures!"

INT. PAN ACROSS DISCARDED CONVENTIONAL ACTION FIGURES, TOSSED ASIDE CARELESSLY.

NARRATOR: Tired of action figures that have exciting adventures all day? Tired of soldiers, astronauts, superheroines, cowboys, Amazons, cyborgs, SCUBA divers, tennis pros and Navy SEALS?

Try INACTION FIGURES! New from WoodsWorld!

SPFX: PAN ACROSS INACTION FIGURE LINE

NARRATOR: Inaction Figures are the ultimate in toy realism, because they could be YOU! There's the garbage man, with trash can. The accountant, with pocket calculator. The politician, with briefcase stuffed with bribe money. The office worker. The stay-at-home dad. The travelling salesman. The out-of-work actor/waiter. The sherpa. The Bollywood director. The obnoxious audiophile, with real vinyl record player. The ageing hippie. The refugee. The dock worker. The auto mechanic. The poet with inkwell, feather pen and scroll. The teen with pickup truck. The research scientist, with stack of grant applications.

FULLY COMPATIBLE with your child's existing action figure line! Does your child's supervillain need someone to torment? Bring in the Innocent Bystander Inaction Figure! Does your Captain Kirk need to put together an away team? Bring in the exclusive Inaction Figure Redshirt Squad!

SPFX: Swirly lights across INACTION FIGURES logo.

NARRATOR: INACTION FIGURES from WoodsWorld! Don't let these figures go missing in inaction - collect them all - before they continue with their mundane lives! 

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