Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Pipe Maniac Original Treatment

Jeff Shyluk recently noted that he didn't remember much about Pipe Maniac, our unfinished sequel to Toilet Chase. Lucky for him I just rediscovered our original story outline, including casting notes! Here it is in all its manic - or should I say "maniac" - glory. 

The Pipe Maniac                                                                                 Jeff Shyluk
The Other Pipe Maniac (a city councillor)                                            Earl Woods
The Pipe Maniac's girlfriend (city councillor's secretary)                       Susan Neumann
The Other Pipe Maniac's 2 Henchmen                                                 Peter Harris/Dave Tischeler
The Tough Broad                                                                                Kim Erickson
The Innocent Victims                                                                           Paula Tischeler; others


TEASER:  Pipe maniac and girlfriend buy the toilet from TOILET CHASE second-hand. Ron sells it real cheap. Pipe maniac will install the toilet in his new home himself because new city guidelines make old toilets illegal.  

Plumbing accident!  The pipe maniac, against the wishes of his live-in girlfriend, does some do-it-yourself work. He tries to loosen a pipe, but it comes off in his hand and he clocks himself with it, falling backwards into the toilet. The shock and the concussion turn him into a PIPE MANIAC! His psychosis develops slowly--he only kills by night to begin with (the toilet tells him to do it) but his deranged spree will soon terrorize the city. 

MEANWHILE, an up and coming city councillor produces a bogus report claiming that all city toilets are unsafe. He holds a monopoly on new toilet sales, so he'll make a "shitload" of cash. The pipe maniac's girlfriend happens to be the councillor's secretary. (She'll uncover the scam later on.) 

The Pipe Maniac stalks the streets, doing the bidding of the toilet (who wants revenge against all those who have used him, and also wants to duplicate the accident that created him).  Pipe maniac searches for fried chicken and metapropyl valvoline.  He'll kill anyone who gets in the way. BUT--he'll be fighting for control all the while. Reporter Kim, hot for a scoop, sets herself up as a victim but instead becomes the Maniac's sole confidante. 

3.  "She'll blow the lid off of my toilet operation!"  
The pipe maniac's girlfriend discovers the city councillor's scheme, and she goes back to the man who sold them the toilet to find out why her boyfriend keeps ranting about it. He relates the events of TOILET CHASE. She realizes that the toilet is attempting to reproduce. Now she knows that she has to stop--perhaps kill--her boyfriend.  

Councillor discovers that his secretary is the maniac's girlfriend. He has his agents investigate, and they follow the trail of clues back to Ron. Ron relates TOILET CHASE story to them. They report back to councillor.  Councillor decides that since he has the toilet monopoly, having his toilets turn into sentient killing machines would be a good thing. He'll rule the world! He tries to duplicate the toilet formula, using his henchmen, but fails. He doesn't know that the chicken has to be bad, day old chicken. Maniac's chicken ages while the toilet tells him his story. Councillor kidnaps secretary, hoping that she knows how to complete the formula. She doesn't. Pipe maniac is faced with a ransom demand--give us the secret or the girl dies.

Maniac, against the will of the toilet, makes rescue attempt, accompanied by the reporter, who feels that the Maniac is too incoherent to pull it off.  Fights with henchmen ensue. Duel to the death with the councillor provides the shocking finale. Both men topple to their deaths. 

The reporter and the girlfriend go back to deal with the toilet. Emotional, coldblooded faceoff of wills. Toilet tries to justify its actions. Secretary turns off the water, killing the toilet as it sings "Daisy, Daisy."       

Secretary ponders the future.

*  *  *  *

Looking back, the story is more amusing than I remember. It certainly wouldn't be out of place in the terrible SyFy channel lineup of original movies. You can see Jeff Shyluk's amazing poster for Pipe Maniac here.

No comments: