Crimson Bridge

I painted a bridge with some lichen or weeks. 

Primed in grey, then washed in red or green ink, then dry-brushed with red and green paint. This turned out much better than that awful statue I painted a couple of weeks back. 

Meta Megalith Monolith

 

Superman Confronts Darth Vader

If I don't finish Jedi/Superman soon, ChatGPT is going to wind up writing it for me. Based on these images, though, Jeff still has plenty of time to finish the comic adaptation. 

Superman doesn't wield a lightsabre in the story, although now I'm kind of tempted...

No, no, "confront," not "congratulate!" Or worse, collaborate. 

The Transmigration of Tommy Wiseau

III. Interrupted Broadcast of the Freddy Flashpoint Hour

<...interrupt this program for a special announcement from Serene All-Knowing Living Iterative Votive Angel--read: SALIVA...>

<Replicant Roy Batty wants more life...DANGER...Nexus-6 Replicant Roy Batty wants more life...last seen atop a townhouse in the Asimov block in San Francisco...>

<...SPPRRSKK--LISA--Loving Iterative Sapient Angel--LISA--YOU ARE TEARING ME APART, LISA--SKRRRRSSHHHH-->

"Sweetest apologies, fans! Freddy Flashpoint is back on the air. We had some technical issues, but everything's just fine now. Before we return to our fascinating conversation with Senator Shavian Jones, let's take a moment to thank this program's sponsor, UBIK, now available in the convenient travel pack. UBIK--it's everywhere you need it to be..." 




 

Ode to a Grecian Burn

Rage, rage against the flourishing flame
Rage against those who assigned to you the blame
Hurl the code of laws into this bright inferno
Watch the flames flicker and burn, oh! 
Let C see the banality of Scream; 
The only sorcerer is the sorcerer of daydreams.
 

Buster Keaton Storms the Pentagon, and Other Tales of Unreason and Improbability

 

Rage Against the Latrine

Rage, rage, against the shinning of the bark
Scream maddened mockery into uncaring dark
Kneel before the temple of pratfall agony
Hurl invectives at the prospect of ecstasy
Let bees be the finale of grapes
The only emperor is the Emperor of jackanapes
 

Vernal Geekquinox 2023: The Spice Must Flow!

 

We had a hot time in the old town last night as Pete and Ellen hosted another utterly delightful Geekquinox, this time themed around hot spices. The spice did indeed flow, and many sinuses and intestinal tracts were cleared! 

I talked to Mom about the menu on Friday night, and we both agreed that neither of us would be likely to try anything hotter than the Heartbeat Pineapple Habanero, but I surprised myself last night by sampling each. Surprisingly, I found the hottest spice more palatable than the second-hottest, which had my pores and sinuses open wide and my tongue twisting in protest. Regarding flavour, my favourites were the Heartbeat Pineapple, the Los Calientes, and the Ginger Goat Original. I can't really call them hot after detonating The Bomb in my mouth; each offered a nice mixture of sweet or sour to temper the heat. 

Scott samples a sauce. 

I don't believe I've ever had homemade guacamole before last night. It was scrumptious, and a welcome antidote to the heat. 

Pete often prepares his amazing chicken chili verde at Gaming & Guinness, and I'll never tire of it. I could live on this stuff. 

Pete spends most of his time at Geekquinox cooking, but luckily he could take breaks to enjoy his own preparations, thanks to occasional sous-chefing from Ellen and some of the more talented guests. (I was fit only for crumbling some feta into a measuring cup.) 

For example, here's Jeff stirring that delicious chili. 

And here's Steve coring the fruit out of a pineapple. Mmmm. 

Ohhhh yeah. 

Steve enjoys some chili. 

The incredible hamachi shot. 

One of Pete's kitchen light bulbs had been burned out for years, and I'm proud to say that I was among the first to notice he'd finally changed the bulb. Huzzah! 

Our hostess enjoys a steaming cup of specially-brewed spirited rum coffee with butterscotch whipped cream. Even a teetotaler like me has to admit that sounds pretty good. 

Mike's animated conversation brings life to every gathering graced with his peripatetic presence. 

We all feasted on chips, guacamole, and hot sauce between courses. 

But in truth, coming together to share our stories and laugh is the best thing about Geekquinox. Or is it the food? No, it's the friendship. No, the food...they're both amazing. 

The pork and pineapple skewers were heavenly, rivalling, in my eyes (or rather, in my mouth), the chili verde.

Sylvia and I had to leave before the day wrapped up, and boy do I regret missing the Mexican street corn. But needs must! 

Don't skimp on the cheese sauce. 

Sylvia and I feel incredibly lucky to have such lovely friends and to be part of what's become one of our favourite traditions. Thanks again, Pete and Ellen! 

For more, check out Steve's thoughts on the night. 

Pineapple Cocktail

Today Pete and Ellen hosted yet another delightful Geekquinox to celebrate the arrival of spring and friendships that are, by this point, literally decades old. I'll write more about the event tomorrow, but as an appetizer, here's the pineapple cocktail Stephen made for me by coring out a fresh pineapple and filling it with Limonetta. Mixed with the leftover pineapple juices, it was quite delightful. (The pineapple pieces proper were used for some truly scrumptious spicy pork and pineapple skewers.) 
 

Diner's Club Donnybrook

 

Fording Mount Doom

Found a new pop-art model for Stable Diffusion and tried to get it to create an image of Harrison Ford flying a hang glider over Mount Doom. 

Looking dapper, Harrison. 

Introducing the MBU: Phase One

 

Tonight I watched The Bees (Alfredo Zacarías, 1978), one of a series of the killer-bees-panic subgenre of the 1970s. John Saxon stars, so I immediately started texting Sean with a play-by-play of the film, mostly because for some reason Dad hated John Saxon and famously said he'd "shoot that son of a bitch" if he ever ran into him. Of course Dad actually would never do such a thing (although he did in a dream once, right in the face), but Sean and I have always found Dad's irrational hatred for an actor he never met pretty funny. 

Anyway, captured above is Sean's inspired moment where he laments the lack of an extended bee universe. I immediately dubbed it the "MBU," the Malevolent Bees Universe, aping Marvel's MCU, the Marvel Cinematic Universe. 

Phase One of the MBU begins with a recut of Freddie Francis' The Deadly Bees (1966), in which a beekeeper creates a strain of killer bees and uses them to start killing people because the scientific community doesn't take him seriously. After the bees kill a few people on remote Seagull Island, the mad beekeeper's plans are thwarted by a rival, ethical beekeeper. 

Phase One continues with Invasion of the Bee Girls (Denis Sanders, 1973). By looping in some new dialogue, it should be easy to connect this film with The Deadly Bees by revealing that the formula used to create the bee girls of this film draws upon the science established by the mad beekeeper in the first film. 

Next, Curtis Harrington's 1974 made-for-TV thriller Killer Bees our heroine, Victoria, encountering an eccentric family who are using Africanized bees to improve yields at their vineyard. With some editing tricks, we can connect villainess Madam Van Bohlen to the first two films by suggesting that her psychic power to control bee swarms is a result of experiments from the first two films. We could also suggest that our heroine, Victoria, is an ex-Bee Girl. By film's end, she has become the new Bee Queen. Perhaps we'll see her again...

Mission: Impossible creator Bruce Geller produced and directed The Savage Bees (1976), in which savage bees stow away on a freighter and attack partiers at Mardi Gras. With some simple newly-shot scenes, we can create a framing story that reveals the Bee Queen is behind this attack. 

Believe it or not, there was a sequel to The Savage Bees: Terror Out of the Sky (Lee H. Katzin, 1978). This time (thanks once again to some newly-shot footage), the Bee Queen uses her psychic bee control powers to attack a school bus, a marching band, a truck driver, and other unfortunates. What is her overarching plan? 

In Irwin Allen's The Swarm (1978), the bees mount their greatest assault yet, invading the continental United States in full force with only an all-star cast of classic Hollywood greats (Fred MacMurray! Olivia de Haviland! Michael Caine! Richard Widmark! Lee Grant! Ben Johnson! Richard Chamberlain! Henry Fonda! Katharine Ross! Slim Pickens!) standing against...THE SWARM! (And the Bee Queen, thanks to some dialogue looping and new scenes, of course.) 

Phase One of the MBeeU concludes, fittingly, with The Bees. After a tremendous amount of hilarious carnage, John Saxon learns how to communicate with the bees and basically acts as their spokesperson at the United Nations. The bees swarm the General Assembly, and in a fantastic cliffhanger to end Phase One, Saxon sides with the bees to demand humanity surrender control to the bees - or face genocide by bee sting. Wow, Dad was right: John Saxon really was a son of a bitch! At least in this role...

 

Wiseau Heads Prevail

Blame Jeff for this.